I am just not cut out for manual labor.

 When my husband and I moved to Texas, we chose a house that was quite hideous on the outside, specifically because there was an empty lot next door that we hoped we could buy one day and make our own.  We did buy that overgrown mangy forest of a lot and 2 years later we (he) cleared all the trees and brush and assorted garbage on it in order to build a garage.  I got out of that because I was working on my masters degree.  A year after that, we (he) built a garage on that lot.  I got out of that because I was studying for the LEED exam.   Six months later we paid someone to come out and grade the rest of the lot, spread top soil, and broadcast seed it so that we can grow some grass and make it look nice.  I got out of that because this job was too big for us and we don't have a tractor or a five man crew, so we paid someone to do it.  So, as you can see, so far  I have been quite lucky to get out of all the hard work going on outside by pretending to study and actually watching Lifetime movies and drinking wine.

I should have known this lucky streak would end someday.

This weekend, I was forced to spend a torturous Saturday hunched over in the blinding Texas sun spreading stinky straw over my beautifully graded and seeded yard and then drenching it in water so that grass will grow.  This doesn't sound like hard work, which is why I didn't come up with an excuse to get out of it; also because I'm out of tests to study for and I really don't want to go back to school.    But it actually is very hard work, hauling bales of straw all over God's creation my yard and trying to make a nice even layer.    It actually didn't take that long, but then I had to go to a party, for which I had been baking bread all day (Damn I am good! - baking bread and yardwork at the same time?~!).     So all in one day I did backbreaking manual labor, made some lovely homemade baked goods, and visited with friends.  I'd say that is pretty rare impressive. 

However, today I can barely walk because my back hurts so bad from hunching over and carrying around those heavy loads.  I had to roll out of my car this morning at Target because I couldn't get out the normal way.  Of course, I still mustered the strength and physical capacity to go to Target.  Duh.  Also my arms are all scratched up in the manner of an addict and I sort of look like i have a contagious form of hives. 

So I think the moral of the story is that yard work, particularly the hard kind and not the kind I usually do which is arranging cute figurines in my flower beds, is no good.  Because the bread was awful and I had to leave the party early and my arms are going to look funky when I go on vacation.  Had it not been for the manual labor, my bread would have been kick ass and I coudl have stayed out all night.    At least that is what I tried telling my husband today when we left Target - to which he merely grunted and reminded me that getting home at midnight does not constitute leaving a party early.   Tiny silver lining - my tan got a little better and maybe I burned some calories.